Secondly, while the book addresses many important topics the core value is to know that you are not alone nor to blame.
Far too often women and men are felt to be at fault. Yet, nothing can perpetuate such horrific and horrendous abuse upon another.
The crime is all about the perpetrator who goes against all norms, all boundaries, all reasoning to commit one to a dangerous cycle of abuse.
Society has allowed this behavior to be swept up under a rug and hidden behind closed doors. The lack of accountability and responsibility and justice upon these perpetrators needs to change.
We need to hold these individuals accountable rather than give them a slap on the wrist and a penalty, fine, or probation for good behavior or first time offenses.
Our family courts in dealing with protection from abuse orders was not mentioned here but I assure you the legal system (regardless of your country) is broken and needs to be changed.
Women are not viewed as believable or credible. They are dealing with courts that have high case loads with low funding and lack of qualified personnel to understand the nature behind the abuse.
Many of these toxic individuals suffer from personality trait disorders that are found on the DSM manual. They are not just bad behaviors they are deadly!
For example, I married a malignant narcissists. He sought to destroy me and my family including our three kids. We divorced in 2013 yet as we speak in 2019 he's in contempt of court for violation of our divorce decree or marital agreement.
It's never ending as women try to seek support and compliance if they are lucky enough to have the funds or the safety requirements to get out quickly.
I was one of the lucky ones as I'm still alive! Though I suffered from financial abuse which left me bankrupt, homeless, and long term unemployed it pales in comparison to what many others have had to endure.
I was lucky I had parents that were able to take me in when he tossed us out of our own home without income, assets, or credit.
I can go into details but suffice to say -my profile speaks volumes- as I now council others on abuse and the warning signs of malignant narcissism.
Please note their are warning signs. These individuals have had years to master their craft and sadly feel above the law because for years they got away with murder. (Yes, I mean that literally as well as figuratively).
I've lost many friends to domestic violence and sadly most of those having never received justice even if the courts rule in their favor.
They will never get compensation, no reimbursements, no child support, no empathy or compassion so please note it's up to them to know their worth, their value, and offer themselves the support they need.
Find like minded individuals who understand the fight or flight responses and the constant walking on eggshells.
Find a supportive structure that provides you safety, support, and love.
Find your inner peace of mind in making yourself top priority.
As women, it's hard to not feel selfish in putting our needs to the front but it must be done.
I applaud all the women and men who are making a difference in abuse cases.
As for the title of this book- Remember nobody can take away your own power. You hold the power within.
I agree with the author in faith and love of God.
He will not lead you astray.
One thing I've found helpful is this : If God is for me who can be against me.
I have used it each and every time when someone attacks me personally through what's known as smear campaigns and falsehoods.
Stay alert! Plenty of wolves in sheep's clothing.
Remember not all devils have horns!
Thank you to Jennifer for this copy.
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